


The Lies of a Trickster

by Pastel_Deku



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Depression, Drunk Sex, Eventual Relationships, Hearing Voices, Intersex Loki (Marvel), M/M, Mpreg, Odin (Marvel)'s A+ Parenting, One Night Stands, One-Sided Relationship, Poor Loki (Marvel), Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-16
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2019-08-24 14:34:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16642049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pastel_Deku/pseuds/Pastel_Deku
Summary: What happens when the God of Mischief has had a longing for the God of Thunder? When a extreme change happens that affects both of their lives, will Loki be able to tell Thor his feels, and better yet, accept them within himself?





	1. Chapter 1

 

Loki sighed, looking up into the darkness of the sky. It was true that the god of mischief had missed being in Asgard, but he despised it as well.

 

He had always been rejected from others as a child, but now, it seemed like everyone altogether shunned him.

 

Scowling, he walked away from the balcony railing and into his room.

 

"It's all Thor's fault..." Loki muttered under his breath, "if he wasn't always the favorite I would be the king of Asgard!" He sighed, collapsing onto his bed.

 

He bit his lip, "although, if Thor hadn't come to my aid...I might not be alive..."

 

He allowed a small smile to escape his lips, but, as quickly as it had come, it vanished.

 

"I shall not think of him of that way. It's just...wrong!" Letting out a groan of frustration, he rolled over onto his side, trying to fight off sleep, and the nightmares that would follow.

 

Just as he was about to surrender to the nightmares, Loki heard a knock at his door. He rolled his eyes, wondering who in the right mind would be awake at this hour.

 

Loki stood up and went to the door, opening it a small crack. He was surprised to be looking up into Thor's sapphire blue eyes.

 

' _Damn those eyes..._ ' Loki thought to himself, immediately glaring at Thor.

 

"Brother!" Thor smiled, ignoring the icy glare from the raven-haired man, "the others and I are going night hunting! Would you care to join us?"

 

Loki continued to glare.

 

"No."

 

He turned to walk back into his room, but Thor gently placed his hand on Loki's shoulder.

 

"Brother," Thor started, "I worry for you. You've barely come out of your room for the last three weeks. And when you do, it is only for new books or to eat, and half of the time, you do not show up to eat."

 

Loki rolled his eyes, trying to brush off his step-brothers worried expression.

 

"Loki, is everything alright?"

 

"I'm fine." Loki spat venomously. He walked back into his room and locked the door behind himself.

 

He sighed, leaning against the wall. "He can never know..." Loki whispered to himself, holding his arms close to his body.


	2. Chapter 2

 

Loki awoke to a sharp pain in his stomach.

 

He bit his lip, wincing at the pain. "Why now...?" The god whimpered softly.

 

Climbing out of bed, Loki stumbled into the bathroom. "Don't throw up...don't throw up..." he mumbled to himself, looking at his reflection in the mirror. He was a ghostly pale, and was trembling slightly.

 

"Oh gods..." he slid to the floor, leaning against the wall, "I hate this feeling..."

 

He sat on the floor for a few minutes, waiting for the feeling to disappear. Once it did, Loki shakily stood up, and took a deep breath.

 

"Well," he said, "might as well go to the library."

 

The god of mischief quickly got dressed and styled his hair, then left the room.

 

"Loki!" The god heard a familiar voice call from behind him.

 

He growled under his breath, and then turned around to see Thor walking up to him.

 

"Brother, you're out of your room." Thor said, voice mixed with shock and happiness.

 

Loki scowled. "Don't worry, I'll go back inside shortly. I'm just going to the library." He turned to walk away.

 

"I'll go with you." Thor said, walking alongside his step-brother.

 

Loki scoffed, but did not say anything else.

 

To be truthful, Loki wanted to be as close to Thor as he possibly could. Though, the god of mischief would never accept that within himself.

 

After a few moments of awkward silence, Loki stopped walking and turned to face Thor.

 

"Why are you acting like you care all of a sudden?" The raven-haired man spat, giving a small sneer to the god of thunder.

Thor sighed, finally agreeing to admit to his brother. "Like I said last night Loki, I worry for you. I also know that you've been keeping something from me, but I know that you will not tell me." His eyes saddened.

 

Feeling his face pale slightly, Loki said nothing, looking away.

 

"I love you brother, but we've grown apart. After you tried to take over Midgard, I believe we even stopped remembering how we used to get along. I also lost all of my trust in you."

 

Loki's breath caught in his throat. ' ** _He only loves you like a brother,_** ' the voice in his head said, ' ** _I mean, if he even loves you at all. Who would love you? You're just a monster._** ' He clutched his head, mumbling incoherently.

 

"Loki?" Thor said, concern laced in his voice. He walked over to his brother. "Brother, are you unwell?"

 

Loki looked at him, eyes glazed over slightly. He was very pale. "I think I am going to be sick..." he whispered. The God swayed, then collapsed.

 

Just before he hit the ground, Thor caught him.

 

"Loki! Loki wake up!"


	3. Chapter 3

 

Thor paced back and forth, impatiently waiting for the healers to tell him what was happening to his foster brother.

 

"How is he?" He asked the healer once they stepped out of Loki's room.

 

"He will be alright," the healer said calmly, "he has been over exerting himself, that is why he fainted."

 

Thor nodded, furrowing his eyebrows in thought. "How was he over exerting himself?"

 

The healer opened her mouth to say something, but she hesitated. "How do I explain this..." she started, "your...brother is the son of Laufey. Frost Giants do not have a specified gender, so therefore Loki can bare children."

 

"I do not understand," Thor said, confused, "why are you speaking of this?"

 

She took a deep breath. "Your brother...he...is with child..."

 

Thor felt as if his heart had stopped. "He is...with child?" The words wouldn't comprehend to him.

 

The healer nodded. "Yes."

 

"Who-who is the...father...?"

 

"We do not know. You will have to ask him when he wakes up." She said softly.

 

Thor nodded, sighing in frustration.

 

**************************************************

When Loki woke up, he immediately leaned over the side of the bed and emptied the contents of his stomach out onto the floor.

 

He groaned, laying back down. ' _I'm going to die..._ ' he thought.

 

Loki could hear talking outside the room. The raven-haired man's brain finally clicked. He bolted upright, panic filling his body and mind. "Oh no...no I cannot be in here...!" He tried to stand up, but the dizziness caught up to him.

 

He swayed, falling back onto the bed. "I need to get out of here..."

 

The god was about to try to stand again, when the door opened.

 

Thor walked in, looking as if he was on another planet.

 

"T-Thor..." Loki stuttered out, looking down.

 

"Loki." Thor said, his voice sounding hollow.

 

They stayed in the strained silence for a few minutes, Loki shifting uncomfortably.

 

"Who is the father...?" Thor finally asked softly.

 

The younger God paled more than before, then looked back down.

"So you know..." he mumbled.

 

"Why did you not tell me?" Thor asked.

 

Loki was silent for a moment, then replied, "because I am a monster." He looked down at his arms, then quickly brought them close to his body.

 

"you are not a monster, Loki." Thor said seriously. He could not believe that his brother still called himself that, even after so many years.

 

"Yes, I am." Loki spat, his eyes becoming glassy. ' _Damn hormones..._ '

 

Thor sighed. He knew that there was no way to change Loki's mindset. "Brother, please tell me."

 

Loki said nothing, he just continued to stare at his arms.

 

"It was at the party you had a few weeks ago..."


	4. Chapter 4

"Everyone was having a good time, and as usual, ignoring my existence." Loki mumbled the last part, shifting nervously. "I technically did not show, but I went because you would not shut up about how much you wanted me to come."

 

Thor nodded. "I remember that much. The rest is a hazy memory."

 

Loki sighed, rolling his eyes. "And that is because you were completely drunk, you dull oaf."

 

The god of thunder ignored the insult. "You're getting off topic, brother."

 

The younger of the two sighed. "Like I was saying, I went to the party, looking for you," his cheeks turned a light shade of pink, which he tried to hide, "this...man grabbed me and kissed me..." His face darkened even more, "I-I guess...it just continued from that point on..."

 

The two brothers sat in the silence for a few minutes, before Thor decided to speak.

 

"You still did not tell me who did it."

 

"I do not wish to. I am not ready. Besides, you'll just go tell father."

 

"That is not true Loki. You can trust me."

 

Loki scoffed, "I can trust you can I? Who is the one who would laugh at me behind my back? Who is the one who just watched when I was put down by father?! Who Thor?! Who?!" Loki's eyes were glistening with tears of anger and sadness.

 

The older brother went silent, suddenly lost in thought. "I am...sorry brother. I never really took to heart all the things that I did to you."

 

Loki scowled. "I don't want your useless apology. You have no idea of all the pain you caused me." He pulled his arms closer to his body.

 

"I want to help you Loki, but I cannot if you continue to push me away."

 

The Raven-haired man was shaking slightly. "Thor...if I told you what really happened...the future of Asgard would be changed forever." He stood up, stumbling a little.

 

Thor reached out to help him, but a Loki pushed him away. "I can take care of myself. Trust me, I've been doing it since I was practically born."

 

He started walking out of the room, but the blonde followed him.

 

"Leave me be, brother." The trickster mumbled, walking to his room.

 

Thor shook his head. "I want to help you."

 

"Is this just going to keep going back and forth?!"

 

Sighing, the blonde stopped outside of his brother's room.

 

"If you really want me to leave you, I will. I do not want you to be in pain because of me." He turned and started to walk away.

 

Loki bit his lip, trying to stop the tears that were threatening to spill. He ran into his room, closing the door behind himself.

 

' _I cannot cry...I just can't...!'_ He threw himself onto the bed, a few tears rolling down his cheeks.

 

' _I'm sorry Thor...I want to tell you, but it would destroy everything that you've created for Asgard...it would destroy...you...'_ he continued to silently cry, cursing himself for doing so.

 

**_You useless monster. Look at you! You're so weak and pathetic! No one could ever love someone like you!_ **The voice in his head screamed at him.

 

"Leave me alone!" He yelled out loud, clutching his head.

 

**_You know that I cannot do that. After all, I am you._ **

 

Loki choked back a sob, shaking terribly. "Just leave me alone..." he whispered.

 

"I need Thor..."

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, Loki loses it a bit here (I feel bad for hurting him this way)

 

Thor was in his room against the wall, trying to figure out what to do with Loki. It had been a few days since he found out of the news that his brother was with child, and Loki had not emerged from his chambers once. He knew that his brother could not suffer this pregnancy alone, but he also knew that Loki wanted to keep him away.

 

_'I wish I knew of how I hurt him. He is quite distressed._ ' Thor thought to himself, sighing audibly. When he glanced out his window, the god realized that the sky was pitch black. _'I guess it has been later than I assumed.'_ He chuckled lightly, turning to get ready for bed.

 

After he changed into his sleepwear, he laid down in his bed. Though he could not sleep. _'I wonder how Loki is holding up. I should go check on him._ ' Thor slipped out of bed, making his way down the hall towards the trickster's room.

 

Just as the blonde male was about to knock, he heard soft sniffling sounds coming from inside. "This is all my fault..." A small, broken voice said from behind the door.

 

Thor was about to just let himself in, but he thought better of it. Giving his brother time to pull himself together, he gently knocked on the door. "Loki..."

 

Shuffling came from inside the room, then it went silent.

 

The god of thunder was just about to say something, but then he heard a soft, "come in".

 

What Thor saw once he walked in broke his heart. There Loki was, laying on the middle of his bed, curled up in the blankets tightly, wrapping himself in a ball. His eyes were bloodshot and had dark circles under them, indicating that he hadn't slept for quite some time.

 

"Oh Loki..."

 

"What do you want Th-Thor...?!" Loki said, trying to keep his voice sharp, but winced as he heard it crack at the very end.

 

Thor said nothing as he gingerly sat down across from the younger god on the bed.

 

"If you came here just to see if I was still alive, I can assure you that I am. Though I wish to be dead, I am still here...I will always be here." His tone got bitter, a few small tears escaping his eyes.

 

"I do not wish you gone, brother. I wish to help you..." The blonde trailed off, trying to find the right words to say.

 

"As much as I appreciate your kind gesture of support, I don't care," Loki said, dripping with sarcasm, "It is none of your business, and I am sure that the kingdom wouldn't mind a bit if you let me be."

 

"You do not mean that, do you Loki?" Thor asked, his expression a mixture of confusion and worry.

 

The raven-haired main snorted. "Oh, l forgot. You're the favorite. I guess I'll have to explain it to you." He sat up, staring directly at Thor. "You see, when your kind is supposed to be enslaved but instead is a prince, people don't take kindly to it. So to get even, they treat you like shit. Every opportunity they get to hurt you in some way or form, they take it. There is no mercy for someone like me."

 

"Not everyone treats you this way Loki, and for those who do, they shall be brought to justice."

 

Loki chuckled mockingly. "You still don't get it, do you?! I'm not supposed to be your brother! I'm supposed to be on my knees sucking cock like the Jotun whore I am!" His sobs wrecked through his body uncontrollably as he collapsed back onto his bed. "I'm n-not s-su-supposed to b-be th-is way Th-Thor...!"

 

Thor gently picked up the younger, holding him to his chest lovingly, but protectively. "You are my brother, Loki. You are nothing less. I love you with all of my heart, and I hate seeing you in so much pain. I want to help you brother, but in order to do that, you need to let me in."

 

Wrapping his arms around the older's neck, the Trickster nodded weakly, trying to cease his tears. He bit his lip, trying for force himself to stop, but that only resulted in him hyperventilating.

 

"Loki! Loki, look at me. Breathe in, and out," Thor said calmly, breathing in and out. Loki struggled for a few seconds, but was able to start breathing again. "You don't have to stop crying. You're safe here, you can let it all out."

 

Loki sniffled, letting out a weak noise of protest.

 

"You don't have to hide yourself, brother. I will not judge you." Thor smiled lovingly at Loki, and that seemed to send him over the edge again. He let out broken sobs, burning his head in Thor's chest.

 

"I'll never let you be alone. You're my brother, and you always will be."

 

For some reason, that statement made Loki happy, but also made his heart break a little. ' _I'll never be anything more than his brother...he said so himself...I should be happy...but then, why do I feel even worse...?'_

 


	6. Chapter 6

 

"I said no, Thor!" Loki yelled at the blonde.

 

"Loki, you have to eat! You've barely eaten all week!"

 

"I told you that I'm not feeling well! Food only makes me feel worse, and I can't keep it down!"

 

Once again, the two were arguing. Neither of them were quite sure how it started, but one thing quickly led to another, which resulted in the situation quickly escalating. 

 

"I swear Thor," Loki threatened, balling his fists so tightly his knuckles were turning white. "If you don't let me alone-"

 

"You'll what?" Thor questioned, taking a step towards the Raven-haired male, "your magic is extremely weak, and you are in no condition to fight me."

 

The emerald-eyed male glared down at the floor. He would never admit it out loud, but Thor was right. A good portion of his energy was going towards his child, and he couldn't risk passing out again and hurting the baby. 

 

The Asgardian took a deep breath, calming himself down. "I understand I've been rather...overbearing the last few weeks, but it's only because I'm worried for you. You've lost quite a lot of weight, and if I'm being honest, you look horrible."

 

Loki said nothing, quickly glancing at his reflection in the mirror across the room. He did look horrible. His eyes were bloodshot and red from crying, with dark circles underneath them. His normally pale skin was a sickening white - almost looking grey. His hair was greasy and tangled, which made him think how long it had been since he had bathed properly. He shifted slightly, causing the loose green shirt he was wearing to slip off one shoulder. Loki's eyes widened slightly at the sight of his collarbones. They were definitely more prominent then they normally were. Had he really lost that much weight?

 

"Fine..." The god of mischief eventually mumbled softly, casting his gaze back unto the floor. "I'll eat something..."

 

Thor smiled lovingly, nodding his head. He left Loki's room, going to tell the servant to prepare a light meal. 

 

"Oh Thor..." Loki mumbled, staring out the window and into the distance. "I'm sorry I'm such a burden..." Though Loki's life had become much easier to manage with his brothers help, the many sleepless nights had taken a toll on him. All the countless hours he would spend tossing and turning in bed, trying to figure out a way to tell the Asgardian. 

 

The magic user walked up to the mirror, gingerly running his fingers across the surface. He smirked tearfully at his reflection. "You're pathetic, really. Swollen with child and unable to do anything. Useless. Magic is a woman's sport. And you aren't even good enough to use magic." He growled at himself, punching his reflection. Loki wasn't surprised when the surface didn't crack. After all, it was build to withstand the trickster's outbursts. 

 

_'Useless. Pathetic.'_ The words continued to replay in his mind, almost seeming to get louder each time. Loki squeezed his eyes shut, trying to find silence within himself. "Make it stop..." he mumbled. The male gently placed his hand on his stomach, feeling the small bump. Right at that moment, Thor walked back into his room, carrying a tray of food that consisted of steak, a small salad, and a pitcher of water. 

 

"Loki?" He asked upon seeing the other's state. 

 

"I-I'm Fine..." Loki said softly, turning away from the mirror. "I'm fine..."

 

To Thor, it seemed the Trickster was trying to convince himself more than the blonde, but he decided to ignore it. 

 

The older of the two set the tray down on a small table by the windows, turning to the raven. "Though you have the silver tongue of lies, I must say that your lies have become less thoguhtout." He meant it as a joke, but still being somewhat serious. 

 

"I'm not meant to do this." Loki said, not even bothering to try and defend himself. "I'm not meant to be a parent."

 

Thor frowned slightly, walking over to his adopted brother. "Loki, you may not see it now, but I can tell that you will be a wonderful parent. You just have to give it a chance."

 

The god of mischief chuckled coldly, shaking his head. "No Thor, that's where you're wrong. You are the one who is meant to be a parent. I am nothing of the sort. The god of mischief, remember? Odin will surely take my child after it is born, for even he will agree that I am not suited for parenthood."

 

The sapphire-eyed male sighed. He was starting to learn that when Loki was stuck in his self doubt, there was no way to bring him out of it. "How about we go bathe? After all, it has been quite a while since you have." Thor was trying a new tactic, seeing if he could distract his brother from himself. 

 

Sighing, Loki nodded his head half-heartedly. "I suppose, that wouldn't be a horrible idea." 

 

_'Maybe, I'll eventually be able to figure out the mystery that is Loki.'_ Thor thought to himself. _'I know there are many things he is not telling me, and they are starting to worry me greatly...'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided I had to update due to the teaser trailer for End Game being released


	7. Chapter 7

 

' _That's the truth Thor...that's who the father is...' Loki said softly, casting his gaze to the ground beneath him. He waited in silence for the Thunderer to answer, but he said nothing._

_"So that's the truth." Thor said after a while. Loki looked up, eyes widening when he saw the cruel smirk on the god's features._

_"You really thought I would stay by your side? That I would be with you through it all?" The blonde stalked towards him, causing the Frost Giant to back up until he felt his back hit the wall. "You are nothing to me, Loki. This is your own fault for being a stupid whore, and I will have no part in it. Father will know and kill you." With that, the blonde walked away, never glancing back at Loki._

_"Thor please! I'm sorry! I-I'll do anything I swear!" Loki fell to his knees, feeling warm tears dripping down his cheeks. He let out a heart wrenching scream, curling up into a ball._

 

*************************************

 

Loki bolted upright in bed, panting heavily. ' _It was just a d-dream..._ ' His body shook as he realized he was crying. The Trickster wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his tunic, then glanced around the room.

 

It was dark and cold, but that wasn't new. Though Loki was terrified, he was completely used to the dream. It had become a recurring theme inside of his mind - the thought of telling Thor taking up nearly all of his thoughts.

 

' _He can't know...he can't know...he can't know..._ ' The raven-haired male repeated inside of his head, his body still shaking from fear. He knew that sleeping would be impossible now, deciding to get up instead.

 

Loki stood up with a bit of trouble, quietly walking over to the doors of his balcony. He gingerly unlocked them and walked outside, taking a gasp of breath as the cold air hit his porcelain skin.

 

As he walked over to the edge, he looked up at the swarming stars in the sky. "Why am I cursed to be a monster, mother? Why did I ever deserve this..." He asked the stars, knowing and hoping that his mother could see him. Loki sighed, subconsciously placing a hand on his stomach.

 

"I am surly burdened to burn in Hel for this..." Loki squeezed his eyes shut, pushing all the intruding thoughts of Thor out of his head. "I'm horrible..." The Trickster looked down at his hands, his mind tricking him that they were turning blue.

 

The green-eyed male cried out, backing away from the edge. Tears welled up in his eyes as he ran back into his room, collapsing on his bed while sobbing. He screamed into the mattress, clawing at the sheets.

 

"Stupid Jotun whore...!" He screamed, his mind filling with flashbacks of all the times he was used for his body. No matter how many times he tried to ignore it, Loki knew he acted like a whore. He remembered all the times he would have sex with others if they gave him something he wanted in return. Whether it was dark spell books, secrets that were extremely classified, or hidden passageways, the Trickster would always get his way - no matter the cost.

 

"I'm not good enough for anything..." Loki whimpered, suddenly becoming void of all emotions he had in the last few minutes. His emerald eyes that once held mischief and mystery were now a dull green; completely empty and cold.

 

Something had snapped inside of him - something that couldn't be repaired with ease. Though Loki was extremely brilliant, his mind had always been his greatest weakness. The real reason Loki pushed people away was because of his mind, despite what others might say. He somehow always convinced himself that everyone hated him because of his heritage and who he was.

 

Loki rolled over onto his back, staring blankly at the ceiling. ' _Would it had been better if I died when the Bifrost fell...?_ '


	8. Chapter 8

 

 

Thor was struggling to concentrate on what he was supposed to be doing to help Asgard. His brain was constantly drifting to Loki, feeling as if he was getting more and more concerned for the younger each time.

 

The Thunderer knew Loki wouldn't trust him no matter how hard he tried, but he would always strive to get any form of information from the Trickster. 

 

Thor was currently in the feasting room with his friends, laughing and having a joyous time. He was trying everything he could do to have a moment of peace inside his mind, but was never content. His worries would always get the best of him - especially when he would see his younger adopted brother. 

 

Loki's mental condition seemed to worsen with each passing day; most of the time he would refuse to even move from the bed. He barely slept - dark circles underneath his eyes as he blankly stared up at the ceiling. 

 

Thor took notice of this, hating to have to use force to get Loki up and eat something. He had practically given up on getting the emerald eyed male to bathe or brush his hair - Thor having to do most of it himself. 

 

Though no matter how much time he spent trying to decipher the mischief maker, nothing would come out as a result. Thor knew Loki never really had any close friends, so it was impossible to find someone who could even begin to understand his mysterious mind. 

 

' _There was mother...'_ Thor thought to himself as he sighed, forcing a smile to the rest of his companions. He was hit with another pang of guilt that he never took the time to be with Loki when they were younger. _'We were so close once...I am the only one to blame for breaking it off...'_

 

The blonde knew that he should go check up on Loki, so he said farewell to his friends and headed down the hallway. He paused before he entered the younger's room, mentally preparing himself for whatever condition Loki would be in today.

 

Once Thor took a deep breath, he headed into Loki's room and closed the door behind himself.

 

The Trickster was basically in the same position Thor last saw him in, staring blankly up at the ceiling. 

 

"Loki-"

 

"What. Have you come back to try and force me up? Get me to move?" The raven haired male's voice thudded with a lifeless sound at the end of each syllable as he continued to stare at the ceiling without a glance at Thor. 

 

"I just came to see how you are doing..." The blonde knew better than to approach the other when he was like this, so he just stayed by the door. 

 

"Of course. Because my health is so important." 

 

Thor's worry only seemed to grow as he watched the younger closely. He would have felt better to hear at least a bit of sarcasm in Loki's tone, but felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up when Loki's voice was basically devoid of any emotion at all; he couldn't tell if he was serious or not.

 

"You're tearing yourself apart. And your child..." The Asgardian swallowed hard, not wanting to have to see the Frost Giant go through a miscarriage. 

 

"I will be fine." 

 

Thor shook his head, knowing the Trickster would be stubborn and ignore his opinion at all cost. "You need to see the healers." Thor hoped that comment would spark a bit of life into his adopted brother, but felt his heart sink upon seeing none. 

 

Loki said nothing as he closed his eyes momentarily, sighing quietly. 

 

"Either you come with me willingly, or I will carry you there." The older felt his chest tighten with pain, hating himself for having to force Loki.

 

"...Odin will know then..." His voice came out barely above a whisper as he lightly licked over his chapped lips. 

 

The blonde had to replay the words in his head a few times due to how quiet the Frost Giant was, but once he had it Thor took a few steps close to Loki cautiously. No matter how deeply he wanted to hug the younger, Thor knew that he had to basically walk on glass anytime Loki would at least release some of his thoughts. 

 

"No one will know about your child. Eir will keep your secret if I tell her to." Thor wasn't positive about most things now days, but he knew Eir would not tell a soul if he told her not to.

 

Loki nodded weakly, the single movement looking like it took away all of his remaining energy. "Alright...just leave so I can change..."

 

Thor reluctantly nodded and left the room, waiting outside the door. As the thoughts of the Trickster swirled around in his mind, he suddenly realized something about the younger. _'While Asgard is in quarrels with the other realms, it seems like Loki is in a full war with his mind as his only opponent...'_


	9. Chapter 9

 

Loki felt as if he was going to be sick. And this time, it had nothing to do with morning sickness. He and Thor were currently waiting outside the throne room to talk to Odin, the silence devouring them both up.

 

The trickster was almost completely positive that the current king of Asgard would banish him for making yet another ungodly mistake; the only difference from this mistake and all his past ones was that this one would surly cost him basically his life.

 

While Loki was living deep inside of his mind, a simple nudge from Thor brought him back.

 

"Father is awaiting us." He said softly, still treat him as if he was glass.

 

The black haired prince grunted in distain, just wanting to get over and through the torture. He walked along side the Thunderer, twiddling his fingers in front of him with so much nervousness his knuckles were turning white.

 

"Father." Thor spoke, his voice coming out loud and clear.

 

"My two sons," Odin began, earning a flinch from Loki at the word 'son', "I hear you have important news that you wanted to discuss with me."

 

"Aye." The blonde nodded, seeming to be a bit nervous himself, "it is neither positive or negotiate, but a mix of both..."

 

"Get on with it." Odin frowned a little, growing impatient.

 

"The thing is-"

 

"-I am with child." Loki cut Thor off, earning a surprised look from the Asgardian. He didn't care anymore, he just wanted everything said as quickly as possible.

 

The current ruler of Asgard paused for a moment to process the newfound information, seeming to grow more angry with each passing second.

 

"I allow you to roam around the palace without guards, to not be imprisoned like you rightfully should be, and this is how you return my gesture of grace?!" Loki bit his tongue hard, trying not to flinch at the harshness of Odin's voice.

 

"Father with all due respect, I do not believe that it was his fault." Thor cut back into the conversation, stepping closer to the Frost Giant.

 

"I did not ask for your input, did I?" Odin snapped at his eldest. He turned back to Loki, pure fury burning in his eye. "Loki Laufeyson, you have disgraced all of Asgard for the last time. I will no longer allow you to continue living here, for you are banished to Midgard for the rest of your days."

 

Loki looked up and met Odin's eye, still staying frightfully calm as he smiled coldly. "As you wish. But wouldn't it be better off to kill me instead?"

 

"You may not be innocent, but your child is." Odin said, then turned to the guards, "take him away."

 

The guards grabbed the Trickster by the bicep on each side, dragging him away.

 

"Father! You cannot do this!" Thor practically growled, taking more steps towards the reigning King.

 

"It is not your choice! You are not king, therefore I make the decisions, even if they are extremely difficult."

 

The Thunderer clenched his jaw and stormed off out of the throne room. "If Loki is banished, I shall join him in his banishment!"

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is super short, but now all that is said and done the story will hopefully pick up more in the next chapter. Also, Odin is A+ parenting is sublime.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, Endgame has officially destroyed me, so have another chapter~

 

The next few moments were a complete blur for the Frost Giant. He vaguely remembers being talked to, then being banished to Earth directly in front of Stark's tower.

 

"I just had to land here..." He grumbled to himself, looking back up to the blue sky longingly. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Loki wondered if Thor actually meant what he said, or if his words were just spewed out in the heat of the moment. He shook the thought away and debated whether to attempt to approach the tower or not.

 

Instead though, his mind seemed to pull up all the memories of his past mistakes and failures - New York being one of the most prominent ones. The green eyed male visibly cringed as he remembered the torture he went through, and the numbers of people that were killed in the process.

 

' ** _All those deaths...it's completely your fault and you can never make up for them.' The dark voice in his head hissed venomously at him._**

 

"I-I didn't mean to...everything just got out of hand..." Loki mumbled to himself, not caring a bit if anyone saw him talking to himself in the middle of the street.

 

**_'It doesn't matter. What's done is done and so many innocent souls died when it should have been you.'_ **

 

Loki dug his nails into the palm of his hand and bit his bottom lip, feeling tears well up in his emerald eyes again. Though others might argue and say that his life was oh so very special and incredible, he would disagree and there was no changing his mind. He knew that New York would haunt his dreams and mind forever.

 

"Am I meant to die alone?!" The Trickster yelled out as the crystal tears started to drip down his pale cheeks.

 

"You're never going to be alone again, Loki."

 

The Frost Giant whipped around, sobbing a little bit harder when he saw the Asgardian Prince standing a few feet away.

 

Thor made his way over to the younger, pulling Loki into a protective hug as he ran a few fingers through the Raven's hair.

 

"Why...?" He sniffled through his tears, wiping furiously at them.

 

"Because brother, I love you." Thor smiled down at him, which only seemed to cause the Trickster to cry harder. Loki clung to the blonde as if his life depended on it, not planning to let go anytime soon.

 

"You'll be safe here. I will let Stark know of this situation and you can stay in my old quarters as long as you need." Thor spoke gently once again, trying to get a sense of the younger's emotions.

 

"...Thank you..." He mumbled, still keeping his head buried in the Asgardian's chest.

 

"Anything for you..." Thor hummed as he looked to the building, "Would it be alright if you waited out here while I go in and talk to them? I'm not quite sure how they're going to react..."

 

Loki wiped his eyes and sighed softly, nodding a little. "I suppose so..." The green eyed male slowly pulled away and chewed on his bottom lip, walking over to the wall and leaning against it.

 

"Alright, I'll be back in a little bit." He grabbed Mjölnir and swung her, taking flight into the air as he went to the balcony of the tower.

 

Meanwhile, inside of the tower Tony was currently in his workshop trying to add a new feature to his suit.

 

"Mr. Stark, I believe that you have a visitor on the balcony." Cut in Friday's voice, causing the brown eyed man to jump slightly.

 

"'Kay, thanks Friday." He mumbled as he set aside his tools, heading up to the main room. When he saw the Thunderer, he had to blink a few times to make sure he wasn't hallucinating due to the lack of sleep he had.

 

"I have a lot of questions, but let's start with the most obvious one first: what are you doing here?"

 

Thor smiled and chuckled a bit. "It's a long story, but to shorten it up, I might be staying here for quite a while."

 

Tony nodded and shrugged, going over to the sink to wash his hands and grab a soda. "Sounds fine. You have your own room after all."

 

The blonde sighed and leaned against the wall. "There is one catch though..."

 

The billionaire looked back to him and raised an eyebrow in question.

 

"Loki is here..."

 

Tony exhaled loudly and rubbed his eyes, momentarily processing the information.

 

"Before you say anything, I can assure you that he is not dangerous. He was banished from Asgard after...well, after we found out he was with child."

 

The man of iron continued to stay silent, to the point where you could practically see the gears turning in his head. "Now I feel like I have too many questions, but I'll ask them later." He sighed and looked back up at the prince, "I suppose...he can stay. But only, _only_ if you promise not to let him go anywhere without supervision."

 

The blonde smiled at the information nodding his head. "I swear. Besides, I honestly do not think Loki is going to be wanting to go anywhere."

 

Tony smirked and cracked open his soda, taking a sip before setting it down on the counter. "I'll go tell the others about the news, if you wanna go get Reindeer Games."

 

Thor nodded, leaving the same way he came before landing in front of the Trickster. "It's alright to go inside now. I talked with Tony, and he said it was perfectly fine for you to go."

 

The Frost Giant nodded, biting his lip nervously. _'I still don't deserve all of this...'_

 


End file.
